Intense Experiences Color Your World and Your Writing

October 15, 2019

Last month, I unexpectedly found myself caring for two older relatives during — what I had no idea would be — the end of their lives. Throughout an intense 6-week timespan, I became a primary care giver and dealt with doctors and nurses. Following the sudden death of one relative, I made funeral arrangements. Then, I dealt with different doctors and nurses at a hospital, a nursing home and finally hospice for the other relative. The second death was somewhat expected, after which I interacted with a different funeral home. It wasn’t the decision making that was hard, it was the reality of dealing with life and death. The 2 deaths were just 15 days apart. This was one of the hardest and most intense experiences of my life.

Dealing with life and death has changed me. 

 

I’m sad and will be for some time to come. I also feel honored and blessed to have done the very best I could, with God’s help and guidance. Some days I can’t believe how much changed during that short time period. Although I’m relieved the intensity has ended, everyday things now seem trivial. How do you go from doing something so important to working a regular job, cooking dinner, folding clothes? From past experience with the death of loved ones, I know these feelings will fade in time.

As I contemplated what to blog about, my planned posts on genre or story form just didn’t cut it.

My experience is hardly unique. People deal with death all the time. I have always had great respect for medical professionals, in particular the care givers and hospice workers. What was so heart-wrenching for me is a true calling for those in the field. I thank God for those people.

It’s said that we reveal parts of ourselves in our writing and I’m no different. I’m a pantser by industry standards, an intuitive writer to the rest of my friends. I go with the flow, let my intuition direct the story line. My recent experience has colored my world and will color my writing. It has touched me in ways I can see and in other ways I may never recognize. I do know one thing. It has changed me and eventually will show up in my writing. Maybe in a hospital scene or an emotional scene with a character dying. Probably in an unexpected form.

My life experiences direct my writing.

 

My fiction includes material drawn from my dating life in my teens and 20s, from social interactions that took place years ago and I didn’t even know I remembered until I wrote them into a character’s life. Material comes from workplace people and happenings, from vacations, from my life. Sometimes, I’m surprised when these memories surface in my writing; sometimes I’m not. I never plan these scenes; they simply bubble up at the right time.

Here’s to my relatives who are now hanging out in heaven. I salute you. I miss you. I’ll be seeing you again soon, in the pages of my fiction.

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Inspire Me!

September 17, 2019

I got into sports at a young age, and my mother gave me three small posters that I framed and hung on my bedroom walls.

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“You must believe to achieve.” 

“The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running.” 

“I can let things happen or I can make them happen.”

quote notes

 

Those posters now hang in my home office, along with hundreds of inspirational quotes I have collected over the years. Since quotes abound online, I’m only including one here. I found it on Twitter; it’s by Jennifer Lee:

 

follow that dream

Be fearless in the pursuit of what sets your soul on fire. Don’t get influenced by what people tell you should be your dream.

 

 

Here are my three favorite motivational movies. I’d love to hear about movies that motivate you.

Akeelah and the Bee – Little Akeelah Anderson competes in the National Spelling Bee.

The Pursuit of Happyness (yes, that’s how the movie title is spelled) — Will Smith is great as a homeless Chris Gardner pursuing career options.

Rudy – Daniel Ruettiger is determined to play football at Notre Dame.

 My friends also provide inspiration, especially when I’m feeling discouraged. The beauty of nature always lifts me up, whether it’s flowers, trees, mountains, lakes or oceans. Finally, and foremost, my faith is the most important aspect of my life – it brings love and acceptance and encouragement and so much more.

I’ll end this post with a poem you may have seen before. Enjoy.

OUR DEEPEST FEAR

by Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us;
It’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we’re liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.

Where do you find inspiration?

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Here It Is! I Found It! In the Candlelight.

September 3, 2019

I shuffled through the bedroom to the adjoining bathroom wondering why it was so light in the room. Squinting at the bedside clock, my eyes opened wide. The digital clock was blank. I looked around the room suspiciously, wondering if one of my cats had somehow pulled the plug.

Shaking my head, I continued to the bathroom and flipped on the light switch. Nothing happened. I groaned, completed my morning routine and ventured into the kitchen where my boyfriend was reading the paper.

His head appeared over the newspaper. “Power went out an hour ago.”

Glancing at the clock, I understood why it was so much lighter in the bedroom. I grunted, got out a bowl with oatmeal and opened the microwave door. “Oh. Duh. Let’s go out for breakfast.”

“OK, the power will probably be on by the time we get back. It never goes off long here.”

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He was wrong.

That evening, as he found our flashlights and battery-powered radio, I lit candles throughout the main floor rooms. The candles imbued a dreamy ambiance. The only problem was that I kept tripping over our black cat.

“This is great.” I plumped up the cushions on the living room and settled in with a thick book. “How often do you get to read with no other demands?”

He raised his eyebrows. “You’re not going to write?”

“Nah. Still not in the mood. I’m only about half recharged from our train trip.” (My earlier post – Big Sky, Blank Paper – explains how I had run out of creative energy, was unable to write, and needed to recharge.)

The next evening, I got home from work to find the power still out. We went through the same routine as the previous evening, except I was all read out.

“Why are you pacing?” my boyfriend asked.

I shrugged. “Dunno. Restless.”

I looked around the quiet, peaceful room with its multiple candles flickering from the slight breeze wafting in through the open windows, and I was compelled to sit down and write. My calico cat curled up next to me and I breathed in the scent of the rose candles on the mantle. With my writing pad on my lap and my favorite gel pen in hand, I wrote. I was calm. I was thoughtful. The words flowed.

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The third evening, I again lit my candles and settled down for an evening of writing. And then we heard a click.

The lights and fans turned on. Through the open windows, we heard the neighbors cheering and we joined in with delight. Relief mingled with disappointment. Writing would not be on the agenda that evening.

The fridge and freezer needed to be cleaned out, laptops and phones charged, candles and flashlights put away… writing would have to wait for the following day.

As I threw away spoiled food, gratitude welled up. Losing electricity had prompted a personal recharge (and an appreciation for all the things electricity provides). I had found my way back to my happy writing place.

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Writing and Running

June 11, 2019

Sometimes when I’m mulling over what should happen next in a story, I go running. Getting away from my desk, running outside in the sunshine, I feel free. Free from pressure and constraints and time. Inspiration comes. Ideas flow.

I’m not a distance runner. I run 3 or 4 miles most days and I don’t go very fast. It makes me feel good and helps me stay in shape.

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When I’m lacing up my shoes to go out, I know the ideas will come. They always do. As I run out of my driveway and down my street, I praise God for the beauty of a summer day and the ability to move my limbs. I wave to the neighbors, talk to their dogs, and watch the squirrels skitter about.

I don’t think about anything except how grateful I am for what I’m doing at that moment and what I have in my life. Even on rainy days, I thank God for nourishing nature and thereby nourishing me. The cold days of winter are a little tougher, as my eyes run, my nose drips, and my throat hurts, but I know I’m clearing my mind, working my muscles, and that I’ll be sitting in front of my fireplace soon.

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Let me close this post with something I saw on Twitter. I added the “or running” part.  The only time I don’t feel like I should be doing something else, is when I’m writing… or running.

Have a great day, everyone.


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